Not Me! Monday

As always, you can check out MckMama's blog for others who are sharing what they did NOT do in the last week.
I do not have a seven year old who prefers to eat from the salad bar on the few occasions I let her buy lunch. She did not come home on Friday raving about the crisp, fresh veggies. And, the previous 3 days, I did not pack her salad with bell peppers, cut up grilled chicken, cucumbers and carrots, only to have her come home with an empty lunch pail and ask for more. Not me.
I did not discover Pandora Internet Radio, thanks to Juli J, find classic 80's/90's music, and rock out while grading papers. And if I had, I would never have had a music duel with Juli in which I accused every one of her favorite new artists as being cheap imitations of the originals (you know, my music). Let's face it, I am not wasting valuable brain power on knowing the lyrics from every Chicago, Journey, Richard Marx, Boyz II Men, and REO Speedwagon song. It's absurd to think I would still know them after more than a decade. Not me.
And on that note, I was not reminded that I did, once upon a time, own both a Vanilla Ice and a MC Hammer CD. And it was not uber cool that they were CD's and not cassette tapes. Not me, cuz I am not that old. 
During Winter Camp, while teaching Ben how to make Stromboli, I most certainly did NOT start a flour fight. That would be immature, so why would I do that? I did not drag Jeremy in when he mouthed off to me, because really, who would think it's okay to throw, flick and toss flour, or put a flour hand print on someone else? And I did not end up covered in flour. Not me.
I did not forget the pepperoni for the Stromboli, causing Dan a hurried and expensive trip to a small local grocer. And I did not accuse him of being the one who forgot it. Not me.
I also did not take some leaders and students on a tour of Lake Arrowhead and nearly get lost going from the grocery store to my first rental house. No one forgets roads they drove for 7 years so quickly. If I had, I would not have kept it a secret from everyone and called it the scenic route. No, Not Me!
I did not get tackled by 7 people in the snow. Twice. But then again I did not score like 10 touchdowns in our ultimate football game in the snow.  And if I had been tackled Dan would not have come to my rescue, only to be tackled himself, in which case he would not have fended off 7 people before being taken down by the biggest guy, who he would never have put into a MMA hold he learned in Gabe's class. Not us.
I did not find the first book Dan gave me last Friday, discover the birthday card he had made for me on my 20th birthday, and fall completely in love with him all over again. And I did not read the card and say to him, "You liked me SOOOO much." And then I did not get all sappy and hug him like he had just written it. Nope, not me.
And, last but not least, my sweet, sensitive, formerly shy and clingy son did not wrestle and fight with Ben for almost an hour on Saturday without ever crying, giving up, or getting mad. And if that had happened, I would not have pulled him out for just one minute to snuggle him, not quite feeling ready for him to be so tough and strong. Not me.